She did it again, the same old thing
Though she knows in her heart what was done was not supposed to be done.
Hasn’t she scolded herself a million times for it?
Hasn’t she punished herself?
But still, she still continues to do so.
Is it that her brain cannot understand or wait is it that stupid heart again?
Telling her to just do it one last time,maybe she will feel better post that.
And yes the heart wins every time. Poor mind cannot control it zillion times.
But today something changed in her body. Her stomach churned and her heart raced.
She was about to commit the same mistake but something told her it was not right.
She thought and stopped but did it anyway.
Her anxiety shoots up along with her heart rate.
She knew in her bones today that she had erred and that her energy had changed.
Maybe today was the last time she did it. The final attempt to stop this cycle.
The end of walking to her past and letting it affect the future.
Yes today she did not make that mistake